Hello Hippolaxative fans.

We just wanted to pass along our wishes for a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

- Hippolaxative Staff

One day at the end of class little Johnny’s teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story….

The next day Johnny tells his story….

“My dad fought in the Vietnam war, his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more, but the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands”

Teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story….Johnny replies, “Yeah… don’t mess with my dad when he’s been drinking”

posted by Varous

One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story....br /br /The next day Johnny tells his story....br /br /"My dad fought in the Vietnam war, his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more, but the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands"br /br /Teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story....Johnny replies, "Yeah... don't mess with my dad when he's been drinking"div class="blogger-post-footer"img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/28021843-1008838268752729041?l=jokevault.blogspot.com' alt='' //divdiv class="feedflare" a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:yIl2AUoC8zA"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:F7zBnMyn0Lo"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:V_sGLiPBpWU"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:qj6IDK7rITs"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:dnMXMwOfBR0"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=dnMXMwOfBR0" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:gIN9vFwOqvQ"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:gIN9vFwOqvQ" border="0"/img/a /divimg src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/JokeVault/~4/LBp7mPNBeXA" height="1" width="1"/

One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story....br /br /The next day Johnny tells his story....br /br /"My dad fought in the Vietnam war, his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. On the way down he drank the case of beer. Unfortunately he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more, but the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands"br /br /Teacher looks in shock at Johnny and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story....Johnny replies, "Yeah... don't mess with my dad when he's been drinking"div class="blogger-post-footer"img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/28021843-1008838268752729041?l=jokevault.blogspot.com' alt='' //divdiv class="feedflare" a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:yIl2AUoC8zA"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:F7zBnMyn0Lo"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:V_sGLiPBpWU"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:qj6IDK7rITs"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:dnMXMwOfBR0"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=dnMXMwOfBR0" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:gIN9vFwOqvQ"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=LBp7mPNBeXA:bR3Q1X7qZtU:gIN9vFwOqvQ" border="0"/img/a /divimg src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/JokeVault/~4/LBp7mPNBeXA" height="1" width="1"/

The true meaning of Christmas
Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.

Santa’s little helper

posted by Varous

span style="font-weight: bold;"The true meaning of Christmas/spanbr /Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.br /br /h3 class="smller"Santa's little helper/h3 div class="para" Bart: What's Santa's Little Helper doing to that dog? Looks like he's trying to jump over, but he can't quite make it.br /br / Bart's prank call to Australiabr /[Stepping in front of the TV]br /Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.br /Homer: Pfft. That's no reason to block the TV.br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"What did Bart write on Homer's butt?/spanbr /Wide Loadbr /Bart Simpson's Propertybr /Insert brain herebr /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"On Millhousebr /span style="font-weight: bold;"/span/spanBart to Milhouse: How can someone with glasses so thick be so stupid?br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"On your soul/spanbr /Bart: Well if your souls real where is it?br /br /Milhouse: It's kinda in here... and when you sneeze, that's your soul trying to escape. Saying god bless you crams it back in. And when you die, it squirms out and flies away!br /br /Bart: What if you die in a submarine at the bottom of the ocean.br /br /Milhouse: Oh, it can swim, it's even got wheels, in case you die in the desert and have to drive to the cemetery.br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"Being Catholic/spanbr / Bart: Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?br //divdiv class="blogger-post-footer"img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/28021843-3584611099965939953?l=jokevault.blogspot.com' alt='' //divdiv class="feedflare" a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:yIl2AUoC8zA"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:F7zBnMyn0Lo"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:V_sGLiPBpWU"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:qj6IDK7rITs"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:dnMXMwOfBR0"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=dnMXMwOfBR0" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:gIN9vFwOqvQ"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:gIN9vFwOqvQ" border="0"/img/a /divimg src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/JokeVault/~4/_ZOiFvdeQho" height="1" width="1"/

span style="font-weight: bold;"The true meaning of Christmas/spanbr /Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.br /br /h3 class="smller"Santa's little helper/h3 div class="para" Bart: What's Santa's Little Helper doing to that dog? Looks like he's trying to jump over, but he can't quite make it.br /br / Bart's prank call to Australiabr /[Stepping in front of the TV]br /Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.br /Homer: Pfft. That's no reason to block the TV.br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"What did Bart write on Homer's butt?/spanbr /Wide Loadbr /Bart Simpson's Propertybr /Insert brain herebr /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"On Millhousebr /span style="font-weight: bold;"/span/spanBart to Milhouse: How can someone with glasses so thick be so stupid?br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"On your soul/spanbr /Bart: Well if your souls real where is it?br /br /Milhouse: It's kinda in here... and when you sneeze, that's your soul trying to escape. Saying god bless you crams it back in. And when you die, it squirms out and flies away!br /br /Bart: What if you die in a submarine at the bottom of the ocean.br /br /Milhouse: Oh, it can swim, it's even got wheels, in case you die in the desert and have to drive to the cemetery.br /br /span style="font-weight: bold;"Being Catholic/spanbr / Bart: Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?br //divdiv class="blogger-post-footer"img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/28021843-3584611099965939953?l=jokevault.blogspot.com' alt='' //divdiv class="feedflare" a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:yIl2AUoC8zA"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:F7zBnMyn0Lo"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:V_sGLiPBpWU"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:qj6IDK7rITs"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:dnMXMwOfBR0"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?d=dnMXMwOfBR0" border="0"/img/a a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?a=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:gIN9vFwOqvQ"img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/JokeVault?i=_ZOiFvdeQho:atsvvWFx46o:gIN9vFwOqvQ" border="0"/img/a /divimg src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/JokeVault/~4/_ZOiFvdeQho" height="1" width="1"/

Little Johnny’s teacher asks, “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Do any of you know why his father didn’t punish him?”
Little Johnny replies, “Because George was the one holding the axe?

From Littlejohnnyjoke.com, a compilation of 40 Little Johnny Jokes.

posted by Varous

One day the teacher walked to the back of the room where Little Johnny was, and he had his hand down his pants.
The Teacher asked, “Johnny, what are you doing?”
Then, Johnny said, “It hurts down there.” “Well then, you need to go to the nurse and see if you can go home”, said the teacher.
A little while later, Johnny came back to classroom and sat back down.
Then the teacher came to the back of the room again, and he had his d**k hanging out of his pants.
The teacher said, “Johnny, what’s that doing hanging out of your pants?”
Then Johnny said, “My mommy said if I can stick it out until noon, she’ll come and pick me up.”

From Deeshay

posted by Varous

A lady boarded a bus with a little baby in her arms. The driver glanced at the baby once and exclaimed, ‘My God. That’s one ugly baby.’
The lady slammed her fare down the fare box and angrily went and sat at the back of the bus. Little johnny saw her angry face and asked her what the problem was.
‘That mean driver just insulted me,’ the lady said.
Sensing trouble Little Johnny’s eyes sparkled. ‘What! That idiot! He shouldn’t have insulted you. What a nerve!’
‘Yeah,’ said the lady. ‘I think I’ll go now and give him a piece of my mind.’
‘Sure thing!’ encouraged the excited Little Johnny. ‘You should tell him that he shouldn’t tell you something so offensive’
‘Hmm, yes,’ said the lady, trying to rise from her seat with the baby in her arms.’I'll go right now!’
‘Yeah sure,’ said Little Johnny, and added excitedly, ‘here, let me hold your monkey.’

From Avi

posted by Varous